Daddy, Mummy, Why Does He Get to Watch Aunty Cossy's Chest in Court?
By Pius Adesanmi.
Enter former Chief of Air Staff, Air Marshal Adesola Amosu's lawyer:
“He has remitted colossal sums of money to the Federal Government, although not in admittance of guilt, but out of cooperation with security agencies.”
N2.6 billion of what he stole is what Amosu has so far refunded in "cooperation", not in "guilt". Allah be praised. We thank Amosu for the uncommon favour he has bestowed on Nigeria. We are truly grateful.
Today, I want to celebrate the Nigerian parent. We may say all we want about the country but there is this terrible bottomline: you still have to raise your children in this culture. And these children are ever so precocious. Six-year-olds of today ask questions we had no sufficient cognitive competence to ask when we were fifteen!
So, your six-year-old asks about Buratai's "savings"; wants to know why they said some people did ojoro employment (Fowler, Emefiele) and nothing happens to them o, yet when he or she does a bad thing, you punish them; wants to know why that man who stole and returns a portion of it (N2.6 billion) says that if you steal and return part of it, it is not a crime. You are just helping out your country by returning part of the proceeds of your crime.
Nigerian parent, you are the one who has to raise a toddler in this environment. You are the one who has to answer their ceaseless questions. I know how grilling those questions can be. I know how probing they can be.
When your six-year-old asks why stealing is not a crime, your country has already diminished your ability to parent that child because you have not a single example of any high-profile conviction for stealing to show that child.
You may say that our courts sentence thousands of petty thieves to prison daily but that is not what constitutes the symbolic reality of your child. That is not what your child sees and hears. The petty thieves that Nigeria punishes heavily is not what is on television. What shapes your child's consciousness is the reality of celebrity mega-thieves that your country always finds "arrangements" for.
What shapes the reality of your child on Channels TV, Galaxy, TVC, NTA, AIT, etc, is an endless parade of high profile criminals enjoying their red carpet walk to and from the court house, serenaded by sashaying EFCC officials and fawning camera people and supporters.
From Dasuki to Alex Badeh to Saraki and and on and on, your child is inundated with photos of criminals laughing heartily, exchanging banter with aides, friends, and supporters, making or receiving phone calls, reading newspapers, checking Facebook for the latest boob photos released by Cossy Orjiakor (this one is my imagination for emphasis o, ehen), even as the presiding judge is busy reading their criminal charge sheet running into billions stolen.
Your child has never seen any of these people punished. You have no example to counter your child's now nearly settled claim that crime is good because it is rewarded and celebrated in this society.
One diaspora returnee Nigerian who loves to preach patriotism and yada yada yada told me an interesting story. He is trying to settle back in Lagos with his wife and their two pre-teen sons after years in Germany. Then one day he returns home with newspapers. Alex Badeh was on the front page of the papers. You remember those famous photos of Badeh reading newspapers and laughing heartily at his trial? Well, my friend's young sons saw the photos and torrential questions he couldn't answer followed.
Since that day, my friend's only job in Lagos now is how to protect his sons from Nigeria... He has forgotten about patriotism because he is so preoccupied with protecting his sons from the examples Nigeria sets for them daily. He does not want Nigeria to teach them that it is ok to steal billions and go to chill and read newspapers in court during your trial because you are confident of the outcome of such trials for members of your class.
This is why I am celebrating you, the Nigerian, parent today. You have the toughest job in the world and we underestimate it for it is easier to raise children in Sodom and Gomorrah than in Nigeria.
By Pius Adesanmi.
Enter former Chief of Air Staff, Air Marshal Adesola Amosu's lawyer:
“He has remitted colossal sums of money to the Federal Government, although not in admittance of guilt, but out of cooperation with security agencies.”
N2.6 billion of what he stole is what Amosu has so far refunded in "cooperation", not in "guilt". Allah be praised. We thank Amosu for the uncommon favour he has bestowed on Nigeria. We are truly grateful.
Today, I want to celebrate the Nigerian parent. We may say all we want about the country but there is this terrible bottomline: you still have to raise your children in this culture. And these children are ever so precocious. Six-year-olds of today ask questions we had no sufficient cognitive competence to ask when we were fifteen!
So, your six-year-old asks about Buratai's "savings"; wants to know why they said some people did ojoro employment (Fowler, Emefiele) and nothing happens to them o, yet when he or she does a bad thing, you punish them; wants to know why that man who stole and returns a portion of it (N2.6 billion) says that if you steal and return part of it, it is not a crime. You are just helping out your country by returning part of the proceeds of your crime.
Nigerian parent, you are the one who has to raise a toddler in this environment. You are the one who has to answer their ceaseless questions. I know how grilling those questions can be. I know how probing they can be.
When your six-year-old asks why stealing is not a crime, your country has already diminished your ability to parent that child because you have not a single example of any high-profile conviction for stealing to show that child.
You may say that our courts sentence thousands of petty thieves to prison daily but that is not what constitutes the symbolic reality of your child. That is not what your child sees and hears. The petty thieves that Nigeria punishes heavily is not what is on television. What shapes your child's consciousness is the reality of celebrity mega-thieves that your country always finds "arrangements" for.
What shapes the reality of your child on Channels TV, Galaxy, TVC, NTA, AIT, etc, is an endless parade of high profile criminals enjoying their red carpet walk to and from the court house, serenaded by sashaying EFCC officials and fawning camera people and supporters.
From Dasuki to Alex Badeh to Saraki and and on and on, your child is inundated with photos of criminals laughing heartily, exchanging banter with aides, friends, and supporters, making or receiving phone calls, reading newspapers, checking Facebook for the latest boob photos released by Cossy Orjiakor (this one is my imagination for emphasis o, ehen), even as the presiding judge is busy reading their criminal charge sheet running into billions stolen.
Your child has never seen any of these people punished. You have no example to counter your child's now nearly settled claim that crime is good because it is rewarded and celebrated in this society.
One diaspora returnee Nigerian who loves to preach patriotism and yada yada yada told me an interesting story. He is trying to settle back in Lagos with his wife and their two pre-teen sons after years in Germany. Then one day he returns home with newspapers. Alex Badeh was on the front page of the papers. You remember those famous photos of Badeh reading newspapers and laughing heartily at his trial? Well, my friend's young sons saw the photos and torrential questions he couldn't answer followed.
Since that day, my friend's only job in Lagos now is how to protect his sons from Nigeria... He has forgotten about patriotism because he is so preoccupied with protecting his sons from the examples Nigeria sets for them daily. He does not want Nigeria to teach them that it is ok to steal billions and go to chill and read newspapers in court during your trial because you are confident of the outcome of such trials for members of your class.
This is why I am celebrating you, the Nigerian, parent today. You have the toughest job in the world and we underestimate it for it is easier to raise children in Sodom and Gomorrah than in Nigeria.
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